That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I just want to make out with him forever
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
