Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
