But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
