How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
