Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
