I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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