and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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