Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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