If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
