i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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