you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
