We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize