she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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