Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
