Ambien. No doubt about it.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
