So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
