we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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