you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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