Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
only you would photoshop your dick
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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