We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
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