I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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