ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I think your dad took our porno
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
