I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
The air taste purple.
Randomize
