if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
where am i from again
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Randomize
