Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Boobs are out for the taking
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize