you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You pole danced in your parka.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
