we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
