hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
