well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize