i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
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