i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
