ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
