i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
