I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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