I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
