You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
birth control should be required to get into college
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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