can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
