Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize
