party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
