Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
