We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
