Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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