help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
It's Friday. Sex?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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