I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
