Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
