try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
