dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
