I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I think i got beer on your cat.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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