he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
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