when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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