Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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